50

-50th entry of the year *clap2*-

esok start Golden Week.yippie~ GW buat pe? jadi kanban ーbukan kemban yekー musume. haha. seyes,tak tipu. sapa nak tengok kanban musume dan musuko tachi,sila datang ke Tokushima 2hb ni ya.

internet dah masuk. agak hari2 jugak la orang dapat kejutkan aku via skype. owh,sapa yang rindu nak tengok pipi tembam aku,nak dengar suara squeky aku,boleh la hello hello aku kat skype.

pagi ni bangun awal.tapi(ada 'tapi' r tak best) termandi serbuk cili.kat dapur umah aku ada poltergeist kot.masuk ni dah 3 kali barang -tupperware- jatuh.nak kata tak stabil,agak tak logik.sebab stabil.so,bertungkus lumus r bersihkan serbuk cili tu.sekkaku da siap kemas umah plak tu.
ーstop complaining!ー

okeh,nak print assignment

49

ngehehehehehe~ just a short update as I still cant transfer pictures from my SD card to my Laptop.
I had been salivating over this poster since I saw it at Village Vanguard AEON Niihama. Selalu berangan nak tampal poster camni kat umah, So,I bought the lady last Saturday. Hihihi~

I like Audrey Hepburn even though I havent watch any of her movies yet. For me, she is soooo pretty and beautiful. Especially in this movie.

I really like my new house(room). So far I did managed to get it to look like what I wanted it to be. I did said that I want a pink room but in reality and due to money restrictions during my first month in here, I settles with a beige carpet, brown curtain supplied by my landlord, black TV rack and black book shelves, black standing mirror, red coffee table and leopard-skin-sofa. The only pink thing(big stuff not small stuff) is my Futon, which I bought them from my kosen days.

As many of you know how messy my room can be, alhamdulillah I managed to keep the messiness to a very minimum level. Insya Allah will try to keep it this way. Serious yo,tak tipu~
Tengah minggu ie selasa,rabu, messy la sikit sebab occupied with lab reports and night classes. Paling teruk maybe on Wednesday kot.Pagi bangun, siapkan report, g lab, g kelas fukushi, balik kejap masak, off to night class again around 7.30pm (class starts at 7.40pm) and I return home around 9.30pm (class finish at 9.10pm or earlier) So balik dah penat, I biasa mandi, have my dinner, chatting/video call while watching TV or doing assignments. Then go to sleep as I have morning classes on the next day.

(kata short update....)
Oklah, dah kul 2.mau tidur~

48

何年たっても
何年たっても
何十年たっても
何百年たっても
どんなことしても
どんな高い服を買っても
どんな可愛い服を着ても
どんな可愛いといわれても
結局
ブス名子はブスのままだよね

haih.......

47

One messy whole day.
takde salah orang lain,salah diri sendiri.
sapa suruh tak buat report awal awal?
sapa suruh layan I am legend semalam?
sapa suh tak bangun awal pagi tadi?
sapa suh takmo bangun dari futon?
takde sapa except diri sendiri kan?

now,sebab lambat set printer,lambat g kelas. skipped breakfast and lunch and didnt drink even a drop of water.
bilik bersepah sepah
baju tak lipat

lapar?dahaga?penat?serabut?padan muka.
kalu diri sendiri takleh nak jaga,dont even think of nak jaga orang lain la.ok?

46

『私って何の為に生きているの？』

『 私の人生にどんな意味があるの？』

45

'When I need him,he backs off.. its not only make me feel hopeless but also make the distance between us feel greater than before'

***
serabut dengan byk menda,but I will try to stay strong. eventho I am going to be alone in this.

44

遠距離って、難しいよね。
会いたい時に会えない。
声を聞きたい時にも、電話代がかかるので、毎日はかけない。
毎日メールとSMSを待つだけで我慢してる。
あの人は元気ですか？
今日何食べる？
今日の仕事はどう？
順序？
今日どんな１日？

聞きたいこと、話したいこと、一緒にしたいこと、は、いっぱいあるよ。

時々、不安・心配になっている。
『あの人は本当に私のことを好きなのか？』
『だまされていないよね？』
『信じてもいいよね？』

色々不安が浮かんでいる。

でも、
私、ここにいるよ。
ここに待っている。
どんな辛くなるかわからないけど、頑張ります。
諦めないから。
そばにいるから。
あなたに、この関係に、信じているから。
ずっと愛しているから。

ずっとずっとずっとずっとずっと

愛している。

43

This is how my scheldule looks like for the rest of the year. Full with labs and enshuus.

I am taking 34 credits worth of 17 subjects(including 2 nights classes), 7 credits worth of 4 summer classes,and 12 credits worth of 12 labs and enshuus this year(2 sems-April 2010~March 2011).

Yet,I still have 10 credits to take next year.and not to forget, another final year project and thesis to write next year.

Will I survive and grad in 2 years time I had gave myself to?

Some said that I am crazy for doing this.
Even my lecturers are betting that I wont finish this in 2 years.

Nobody knows except Allah.

This time I want to push myself to the limint and see what am I truly made with and to prove to people around me of what I am capable to.

I will let you know eventually.

42

Some met at schools
at tution centres
Some met through friends
or through relatives
Some met through the Facebook
and others through the Friendster
while some through chatsites
or through blogs
Some met accidentally
While know each other since forever
You never know where and when you are going to meet the special one
You might had met him/her somewhere before
Or hadnt yet.
as your path and his/her hadnt cross with each other yet.
I know
because the same thing happened to me.

how we met?
when did we met?
why we met?
what are the purpose of meeting him?
how long we are going to be together?
how far will we go?
etc
are still unanswered
as we are still written our own story.
with our own way
with our own style
others might think that our story are unbelievable
or lame
or ordinary
but this is
Our Own Story.
Nobody else's.

41

この後はどうしたらいいかな？

日本に就職するか？
国に就職するか？
大学院に進学するか？

私は何をやりたいのか？
何にになりたいのか？
どんな人になりたいのか？

Hmmm....

自分はまだはっきりわからないよ。

将来は見えないよ。

今、まだ見えない。

走り出したいけど、一歩でも歩き進めない。

どうしよう…

40

= LOVE

Found this red beauty at a secondhand shop.

Fell in love with her almost instantly. And she is perfect for my new room
p/s: I am now officially an undergraduate student. I am going to try the best although what lies ahead me isnt a bed of roses.